Kid wishes dad would just shut up on campus tour

Madeline Diamond, Senior Editor

High school junior Brendan Silbermann rolled his eyes as his totally lame dad, Rob, asked more than his fair share of questions on their recent tour of the University.

“Now, what is the ‘party’ scene like here?” the elder Silbermann said, using exaggerated air quotes.

Brendan was seen glaring at Rob and pulling the hood of his Delbarton Lacrosse sweatshirt over his head.

Campus tour guide Kelsey Kalman ’18 stuck to the script and told Rob that “the consumption of alcohol exists on all college campuses” with a nervous laugh.

“What about the grub?” Rob said, patting his beer belly, as they entered Bostwick Marketplace.

Brendan tried to distance himself from Rob as his questions grew increasingly embarrassing.

“My dad is so annoying. He’s making me go on all these college tours during my spring break. I just want to go home and skateboard with my friends,” Brendan said.

As they waited for their milkshakes at 7th Street Café after the tour, following Kalman’s suggestion, Brendan told his father that he didn’t really like the University anyway; he’d rather go to Colgate.

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