Campus Crushes

To: Amelia Bohidar ’17

“Amelia Bohidar’s chill to pull ratio is as chill as it gets.”

 

To: Tom Murphy ’17

“I think Tom Murphy is the most handsome radio DJ at this school and I LOVE his radio voice <3.”

 

To: Alex Greene ’17

“Alex Greene, you are the apple of my eye. Meet me in front of Hulley House at midnight on Valentine’s Day and I’ll prove it.”

 

To: Will Train ’17

“Roses are red, violets are blue, I know you won’t ask me on a date, so I will just do it for you.”

 

To: Matt Whitstock ’16

“Do you have a raisin? (checks lunchbox) No? How about a date?”

 

To: Lizzie Sheprow ’17

“Dearest Lizzie Sheprow,

You are a perfect human being, and every time we hang out, you only become more perfect to me. Valentine’s Days are better single anyways … #netflix … with me 😉

Much love always,

007”

 

 

To: Kendall O’Brien ’17

“Dearest Kendy,

Roses are red,

Violets are blue.

Not even emojis can show

Just how in love I am with you.

Kanye might love Kanye,

But that can’t compare to the crush I have on you.

You’re the peanut butter to my jelly,

the conditioner to my shampoo.

I hear that you like llamas,

and that you don’t have one, but two!

If you’ll be Petunia, I’ll be Maurice

And we can run away and say ‘Adieu!’

So this Valentine’s Day,

Just promise that you’ll be the one I bump into.

Love, Karl”

 

 

To: Sam Cohen ’17

“10 a.m. August 27, 2013. Our first day of class as Bucknellians. A cranky and groggy Amanda Foto shuffles into class, and there is only one seat open between Sarah Craig and Avid Khorramian. Amanda sits. Upon surveying the room, she catches the eyes of a cranky looking guy sitting one seat away. For some reason, she was drawn to him. Little did she know, he felt the same way. The mystery boy, Sam Cohen, was listening to ‘A Thousand Miles’ by Vanessa Carlton, and she could hear it playing through his headphones. She turned to him and said, ‘Are you a big VC fan?’ He replied, ‘No,’ and the conversation was over–for the entire semester. The two ran into each other at a Sigma Chi register later in the year. He approached her and said, ‘You know what, I am a big Vanessa Carlton fan.’ Then, he swept her off her feet and back to his dingy little dorm room. He turned off the lights, and put on his favorite Vanessa Carlton album. I know what you’re thinking. Now, most people think Sam and Amanda are good friends. But in reality, they are so much more.”

 

 

To: Katie Solesky ’18

“Just want you to know that you have an admirer in your English class. You’re pretty, have a beautiful smile, and look cute when you blush. Do you want to go out for a cup of coffee sometime?”

 

To: Nate Hunter ’17

“To Nate Hunter from several admirers … Thanks for always keepin’ it Cali Cool.”

 

To: Stephanie Grayson ’17

“Girl, if you were a fruit, you would be a fineapple.”

 

To: Kate Keller ’16

“Kate Keller, your eyes sparkle like the mid-morning sun. Your presence ignites a fire in my heart. Kate Keller, you are the Kate Middleton to my Prince William, you are the Michelle Obama to my Barack Obama, and you are the Amal Clooney to my George Clooney. I know we cannot be together at this time in our lives because of unforeseen circumstances, but you are on my mind every waking second, minute, half-hour, and hour of every day. Kate Keller, thank you for the spiritual enrichment you have given me in this past six and a half days since we met at my mixer.”

 

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