Transitioning from last week’s article, I want to talk about the dark period in our history that was the early 2000s. It was arguably the worst decade of fashion. Justin Timberlake and Britney Spears at the 2001 MTV Video Music Awards was just the start. From gaucho pants to Von Dutch trucker hats, we just have to ask ourselves, “Why did we do it?”

Honestly, I’m not entirely sure where to begin since there are so many things that went wrong. I guess butterfly clips would be a good starting point, since they were the most obtainable. I, like most of you, had these in every color. I would do those twisty not cornrow-cornrows whenever my mom did not insist on taming my crazy, frizzy hair. The problem with butterfly clips is that they were insects for your hair. Why would having insects in your hair ever be attractive?

The best part about these clips, though, was that you could buy them from your local Limited Too. You could get everything and anything from there. You want a skinny scarf to go with your shirt that had the detached sleeves? Yeah, they had 14 to choose from. The new NSYNC HitClips pack? That was fully in stock right next to the Backstreet Boys pack. As great as Limited Too was, it fed our worst fashion trends.

This was where I got my most prized possession of the fourth grade: my silver sequin camisole. My mom got it for me as a surprise to wear to the Hilary Duff concert. I wore it under my powder blue velour track skirt set with my knee-high black leather boots. The track pants were much too casual for such an event, so those were left at home next to my gaucho pants.

Gaucho pants were arguably the most horrific, yet comfortable piece of clothing to have ever lived. They “looked good on everyone” because they flattered no one. They had absolutely no shape. But damn, did I think I looked good when I paired them with my platform flip-flops. Besides giving me that extra inch to get on the big kid rides at amusement parks, platform flip-flops served no purpose other than to cause me to consistently trip up and down stairs. Sometimes I didn’t even need the stairs to trip over because flat surfaces worked just as well.

Beauty is pain though, am I right? It’s the same reason that we layered our polos, just so our range of arm movement could be impaired. Anything to have the double popped collar to go with our plaid Bermuda shorts or denim mini skirts from Abercrombie. My mom hated nothing more than when I wanted to go to Abercrombie. She would lose her hearing and sense of smell while I tried to convince her to buy my 11-year-old self a shirt that said “Abercrombie” 18 different times.

Despite all of the train wrecks of the early 2000s, they did bring us some good memories and laughs. I’ll never get tired of looking back at the pictures of my friends and me wearing knee-high socks and UGG boots, or thinking I was the coolest preteen to walk the face of the earth with “Pink” written across my backside. So here’s to the early 2000s for having the absolute worst taste in fashion. You tried your best.