Du’s and don’ts: flood fashions

Elizabeth Duswalt, Columnist


You’re probably wishing I wrote this article before Feb. 14 when the new senior apartments were raining indoors. Honestly, after seeing the ceiling open up and unleash enough water to fill the Susquehanna,* I was inspired. Here are a few fashions you’ll need to look good in case your residential building begins to rain on you.

Rain ponchos. This one is an absolute must. There really is no excuse for not owning this one. Everyone should keep these in stock. You can get two for like a dollar. Major key is that they are see-through, so if you want to show off the bod, this is the perfect outfit.

Hunter rain boots should be your investment piece. This is your opportunity to finally justify spending over one hundred dollars on rubber boots. What other footwear could you possible don during an indoor rainstorm? This is how I convinced my mom to buy me a pair.

Those hats with the umbrellas on top are a wise choice as well. This way your hands are free to move all of your belongings out of your room to save them from water damage. You can probably find one of these on Amazon.

Lastly, you should get rain pants. You know those swishy pants that you could get as a kid and zip off half of the leg to make them shorts? Sometimes if you were lucky, you could find them where they had two different zippers so you could wear them like shorts or capris. Anyway, you should get these because they make such a loud noise while you walk that your roommate will know your exact location even when the water has gotten into their eyes and blinded them. Secondly, as the water level rises you can zip off different portions of your pants. I think this is why some people call capris “floods,” since their pants are always prepared for the floods.

Whether you choose one or all of these fashions, good luck during the next interior rainstorm. May the floods be ever in your favor.

*Exaggeration not a true statement. Maybe enough water to fill Bull Run Creek though. 

(Visited 226 times, 1 visits today)