Supply and command: a sticky situation leads to alternative decorating techniques

Bridget Beljan, Satire Co-Editor

From new facilities to new faces, one does not have to be a first-year to experience the unpredictability that comes with the start of the academic year every August. In fact, when the time comes along for move-in, students can count on one thing, and one thing only: forgetting to bring Command Strips.

Fortunately, the solution to this annual accident lies a mere seven-minute cruise down Route 15 at everyone’s favorite commercial giant, Walmart. But this year, students didn’t have it so easy—Walmart was stripped of its strips.

In hopes of relieving some of the shock such an unexpected realization could cause, Public Safety issued a warning to students. With all of their trust in the big-box store, however, some students brushed the murmurs off as fake news and proceeded to see for themselves.

“Walmart is like its own galaxy, so after looking in both the tools and arts and crafts sections, I hadn’t lost hope,” Cam Strip ’20 said . “I passed through the fashionable wardrobe selection, wandered my way past the gun ammunition, and ended up in the premature mountains of Halloween candy before I decided to ask someone for help.”

Strip broke into tears before finishing her comment. The attendant confirmed her worst fears: the sticky hooks, hangers, and helpers were depleted. 

In order to avoid living in dorms rooms comparable to solitary confinement, students turned to some unconventional methods when it came to sticking their decor on the walls.

“Honestly, I’m pretty proud of how my room turned out, despite the lack of strips,” Dana Deck ’23 said . “Using a combination of glitter glue and bubblegum, I was able to hang up my Polaroids, twinkly lights, and Billie Eilish poster. I just hope my wooden monogram doesn’t fall on my head in the middle of the night.”

Like the fate of Deck’s head, only time will tell whether these resourceful tactics will leave the walls torn and tattered, or damage-free. Regardless, this sticky situation proved to students that they didn’t need Walmart to (temporarily) fill their walls.

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