The Bucknellian

Overherd on campus

Overherd on campus

Madeline Diamond & Courtney Wren, Senior Editor & Satire Editor

March 9, 2017

“Should I ‘finsta’ this or do you think his girlfriend would screenshot it?” “I don’t know if I should apply to be an OA, I’m not very social.” “I think he cares a lot about his hair, so I would gladly shave it off if I could.” “Does anything about me scream ‘chopped...

Senior English major takes lab science, realizes she has to ‘try’

Senior English major takes lab science, realizes she has to ‘try’

Emma Sheehy, Contributing Writer

March 9, 2017

The semester from hell finally happened for English major and arts and crafts minor Carly Trout ’17 when she was forced to face her lab science College Core Curriculum (CCC) requirement after years of convincing herself that she’ll “just do it later” and that “it can’t be that bad.” The...

The List: Better ways to spend spring break than going on a trip with 17 of your friends

March 9, 2017

1. Teach yourself how to knit via a YouTube tutorial. 2. Take your cat to the dentist. 3. Try to recreate Amami’s Sriracha mayonnaise. 4. Watch all 331 episodes of “ER.” 5. Memorize all the U.S. state capitals. 6. Take up juggling. 7. Rewrite the “interests” section of your resume. 8. Apply ...

Young Love: An open letter to that couple from freshman year

Madeleine Silva, Web Managing Editor

March 9, 2017

I see you; we all see you. You’re that couple that created a relationship out of the hot muggy air that festered throughout New Student Orientation back in August. While the majority of students struggled to find even the bathroom, you two somehow managed to find love. That’s really great for...

Newly politically engaged student only describes beliefs in ‘Hamilton’ lyrics

Newly politically engaged student only describes beliefs in ‘Hamilton’ lyrics

Madeline Diamond, Senior Editor

March 2, 2017

Christina Adams ’19, a newly registered voter as of the 2016 presidential election, never considered herself to be that political. However, after recently seeing “Hamilton” on Broadway, she experienced an awakening. “You want a revolution? I want a revelation, so listen to my declaration!...

The List: Highly recommended ways to introduce yourself at a career fair

The List: Highly recommended ways to introduce yourself at a career fair

Madeline Diamond and Courtney Wren

March 2, 2017

Throw a paper airplane made from your resume across the room. Slip a $20 into their hands when you shake hands. Break into a four verse song explaining why you want to work there. Somersault up to the desired booth. Speak only in Pig Latin. Ask the company representative wh...

Fat Tuesday files for legal name change

Fat Tuesday files for legal name change

Jon Meier, Staff Writer

March 2, 2017

On the morning of Feb. 28, Fat Tuesday, known to many as Mardi Gras, filed for a legal name change at the New Orleans Civil District Court. On the front steps of City Hall, Tuesday addressed reporters with close friends, Ash Wednesday and Good Friday, beside him. “The word fat is a venomous word...

Overherd on campus

Overherd on campus

March 2, 2017

“My crockpot was supposed to arrive today.” "I can't go to your Mardi Gras party I'm going to an accounting pregame." "Ya know I talked to that girl during rush, and I did not think she would wind up in Kappa." "You post some very woke stuff on Facebook." Tour guide: "Let's get the boring stuff out o...

Young Love: Gym Boyfriend

Young Love: Gym Boyfriend

Madeleine Silva, Web Managing Editor

March 2, 2017

As Sarah Neilsen ’17 did sit-ups on the mat under the stairs in KLARC, she saw the same tall, tan, and sweaty boy as she did every Tuesday at 5 p.m. She knew that their unwavering eye contact while she worked her core and he used some oversized machine no female in the gym touched meant nothing....

Breaking: Student goes to Super Saturday, doesn’t post photo

Breaking: Student goes to Super Saturday, doesn’t post photo

Emma Sheehy, Contributing Writer

March 2, 2017

Downtown Lewisburg on a warm spring day tends to be a time of carefree fun for University students. For Stacy Hunt ’17, however, the day turned bleak as a lost phone turned into an experience of lost identity. Hunt claims that she dropped her phone somewhere between Larison Hall and South 6th Street,...

First-years desperately shmooze older students as recruitment approaches

First-years desperately shmooze older students as recruitment approaches

Maggie Carlson, Staff Writer

March 2, 2017

With Fraternity and Sorority 101 sessions scheduled to begin soon, the start of informal recruitment has arrived and with it, first-years have begun to “completely and totally lose it,” according to Head Director-General of Greek Cohesion and Facilitation Smith McDonnell. The pressure to connect...

Senior student who stays in on a Saturday night refreshes Venmo feed to feel included

Senior student who stays in on a Saturday night refreshes Venmo feed to feel included

Marissa Weiss, Contributing Writer

February 23, 2017

Following a Saturday night in, Penelope Phi Omega ’17 told reporters that she spent the evening compulsively sliding her finger down the home screen of the Venmo app, continuously refreshing the list of transactions her friends have made to one another. “I normally count down the minutes until ...

The weekly student newspaper of Bucknell University
Satire