Last Friday morning started like any other college day. I woke up, grabbed my usual iced coffee and felt a sense of relief after acing my morning Arabic quiz. After a refreshing shower, I met up with friends for lunch and attended a few meetings. The day was bright and I felt productive and relieved that the week was coming to a close. Then, it was time for work.
As a Weekend event manager at the 7th St Studio, I genuinely enjoy my job and the incredible people I get to work with. We were hosting a much-anticipated event: Botanical Lego House Plants. The excitement was more than visible as attendees flooded in right at 5 PM. However, within minutes, we completely ran out of supplies. It was an unexpected turn of events, leaving my coworkers and me scrambling to come up with alternative activities to keep people who were still coming in entertained and content.
Despite the initial chaos of a busy event, things eventually calmed down and I took a moment to enjoy a delicious milkshake from the nearby 7th St Cafe, my usual Friday sweet treat. It was a relieving, pleasant day so far. But then, amid the friendly conversation and laughter, I heard a sudden shift in tone. “Active shooter alert,” someone said loudly. They didn’t scream. They said it loudly as if they didn’t process it fully yet. The words echoed in my mind and sent shivers. It didn’t process yet for me either. I grabbed my phone so I could check for myself what was going on. It started ringing at that exact moment, and I recognized the number as Bucknell’s alert system. The message shook me: “An active shooter has been reported on campus. Seek safe shelter immediately.”
The reality of the situation seemed to hit everyone one by one. Despite the upbeat music and the bright sunlight streaming into the studio, fear gripped us all. It felt surreal and chaotic, almost impossible to process. But we had to act.
My coworkers and I frenzied around, trying to jump to action. We locked up the studio and directed everyone to the most secluded place we could think of. The urgency of the situation was overwhelming. Amid all the chaos, I found myself shouting at everyone to move faster. I felt overwhelmed and antsy as the anxiety and panic were setting in faster and faster.
We huddled together in silence. No one dared to move an inch. I felt fear pulsing through my veins but mentally, it wasn’t hitting me at all. All I was thinking about was how I was going to get out of that situation and what my next moves had to be. In hindsight, I think it was because the last time I was in a life-threatening situation, I froze up and reacted slowly. And that moment haunted me for a long time. But this time around, I wish I could’ve fully processed my emotions. My thoughts were all over the place and the anxiety was so overwhelming. People were crying, sending frantic texts to loved ones and desperately hoping for the best. The uncertainty was paralyzing and the rumors circulating through Fizz and YikYak only added to the terror.
I remember texting my mother as I was too scared to call my parents and make noise. I sent and received more “I love you texts” than I can even describe. It was after I began to see all these messages and rumors going around Fizz and YikYak that I felt the tears running down my face too.
It felt like an eternity, but in reality, only about an hour had passed before we finally received the all-clear. 55 minutes to be exact. 55 minutes of thinking everyone’s lives were in danger. 55 minutes of sheer terror and unrelenting anxiety.
I was thankful for the relief, but the trauma of the whole ordeal lingered. It wasn’t the sort of relief where everyone around rejoiced and smiled, or cracked a joke. The dark, terrifying atmosphere was still there. Not a single person smiled. Everyone just wanted to leave. We still weren’t aware that it was a hoax. I am obviously well aware now that it was a hoax, but the fear I felt was very real.
As we closed up the studio early and made our way back to our dorms, it was no longer shining bright outside. The weight of the day’s events hung heavy on my mind. I found myself being so thankful that we had so many people come to the event that supplies ran out early, meaning there weren’t that many people present when we got the alert. I mean, I don’t think we’ve ever had an event end that early due to the crowds of people coming into the studio. This alert only happened after the studio was unexpectedly less busy. It could’ve been so dangerous having that many students in one room.
The prevalence of school shootings and mass violence in our society is a harsh reality that cannot be ignored. But, I personally think we’ve become desensitized to it. It’s something that’s taken over the country for decades now. According to The Sandy Hook Promise, since the shooting at Columbine High School in 1999, more than 338,000 students in the U.S. have experienced gun violence at school. This speaks volumes about the scale of the issue. These numbers represent lives disrupted, families shattered, and communities forever changed. Experiencing the fear of something like that happening was the type of fear that I’m still grappling with and trying to push away. I can’t imagine what it would feel like had that situation not been a hoax, nor do I want to.
After this whole ordeal, I’ve been much more appreciative of the little things as well as all the wonderful, bright people I’ve been so thankful to meet at this place. Moving forward, I hope I can cherish every moment and hold onto the ones I love a little tighter. Life is precious and the thought of it being taken away in an instant is a chilling reminder of our vulnerability. We should never take our safety for granted and continue to treasure each day, embracing the love and connections that make living truly meaningful.
