It’s a Saturday night in Lewisburg. The campus feels relaxed, there’s laughter on the walkways downhill, and you’re very ready to retreat to your room to watch Netflix alone … wait, what? Oh yes, in case you’ve forgotten, it’s Valentine’s Day. That wonderful day when couples either revel in their relationships or realize they’re unhappy, and single people everywhere face a long night of either self-pity or defiance. What are the valentine-less to do? Well, whichever camp you are—go out in defiance or stay in and wallow—Lewisburg is a great place to drown your sorrows in pizza. Pizza has always been seen as the classic staple of college diets everywhere, and whether you prefer pepperoni, mushrooms, or peppers and onions, there’s a place in Lewisburg that will please you.

“I like Pizza Phi,” Kate Scott ’17 said. “They also have really good lava cakes, and it’s really close to campus.”

Pizza Phi, with a name that plays off of the college Greek scene, offers the most diverse wallowing menu. There are four sizes to choose from— personal (you’ve just gotten out of an unhappy relationship and you’re really feeling the single life), medium (you haven’t been with someone in a while, and it’s bumming you out a little), large (you were dumped and now they have a new thing going. Tonight is pretty bad for you), and extra large (you were dumped an hour ago). There are more flavors at Pizza Phi then you would find on Arthur Avenue—Cheese, Botanical Garden (hey, vegetable lovers!), Maui Waui, Barbecue Bacon Cheddar Chicken, Buffalo Chicken, Chicken Cordon Bleu, Cheesesteak (yes, this is still pizza), Cheesy Trifecta, The Great White, Belly Buster, the Pizza Phi Deluxe, Carnivore, Italian Hoagie Pizza, Mean Green Dragon, and Chicken Bacon Ranch. All of them are New York Style thin crust. The menu also showcases a variety of other Italian-American classics.

“Pizza Phi is good, but … I like the thin crust style at Casa,” David Frering ’18 said. 

La Casa de Pizza has a much smaller menu, but is just as good. It has a classic little pizza shop feel, and the owner is eager to come over and chat (are you a chatty valentine-less soul? If you’re a wallower, I would go in with a crowd).

You can order a cheese pizza adorned with up to three toppings of choice, or get a Veggie or Meat Lover’s pie. The toppings range from pepperoni to pineapple to sausage, and one can be sure to create a combination that will fill his or her heart with as much warmth as a valentine would. Of course, lurking in everyone’s mind is the ominous third choice. When asked about Domino’s, both Scott and Frering shook their heads.

“Domino’s is for when every good food place is closed,” Frering said.

This may be true for many, but on a special night such as this one, a certain level of sadness could keep you up late into the night. If you’re hit with the 2 a.m. blues, the little car with a bright pizza box top is just a phone call away.

 “The caf pizza is better than any of them,” Zach Williams ’18 said. “Why go downtown when it’s all-you-can eat right here? And I know good pizza, it’s not bad stuff.”

It’s not a bad point. In fact, the good old Bostwick Marketplace is the perfect place to avoid all the couples you might see on your walk down Market Street. As Feb. 14 approaches, the valentine-less may get nervous and antsy for how they will face the big day. I assure you that armed with a good slice of Lewisburg pizza, you will make it to Sunday morning alive and intact.