The following article contains information documenting the stress and agony of 21st-century post-grad job hunting. At this time, I’d like to take a moment to kindly invite all of the engineers and business majors to stop reading. You will all be OK, because the world needs more of your brains. Prayers up and keep doing what you’re doing– love you guys.

Over winter break, I reached out to a friend of a friend of a friend of a cousin of a friend to network and try and snag a job. He knew my family from the old country. We were tight, maybe, but more importantly, he worked at a production company. So I was either gonna become his best friend or die trying.

Now, when he was in his youth, there was no LinkedIn, no one million hours of community service, no forty letters of recommendation from the Queen of England, nothing. One front and back resume was all it took, and he’s been a CEO for twenty years. It was quite the shocker when his company told him that, unfortunately, they had stopped hiring interns for the summer of 2026 in January. Right. Perfect.

Job hunting post-grad can go one of several ways. The first is obviously the most desirable: enter college with an intended major, declare said major, graduate with a degree in said major and immediately pursue an occupation using said major. Engineers and business, that’s all you. Prayers up, again, you guys all rock. Personally, I’m an English major. I took Stats 101 my sophomore year, and my professor asked me to drop because I was embarrassing him. So, naturally, my path is gonna be a bit more dicey.

As do many of the arts and science majors, the game of life is a lot trickier than the latter option. It goes something more like: enter college with an intended major, declare said major, graduate with a degree in said major and hit a fork in the road. To the left, there’s higher education. I’m talking master’s, doctorates, etc. If you’re on the pre-med or bio track, don’t even worry about getting a job. You’ll finish school by the time your first great-grandchild arrives. But look on the bright side, at least you’re still doing what you got an education for. Because then there’s the right fork of the fork in the road: funneling through odd job after odd job and working your way up the ladder until you get to use your education. I’ve used my college education for anything but English for the past four summers. Last season, I tried to get an internship for a month, got frustrated, quit and ended up working as a hostess for a fancy restaurant in my hometown. Was fine dining employment my ultimate career goal? Absolutely not. Did I still need a paycheck? Absolutely.

And when I tell people I’m majoring in English, the very first question they always ask is, “Are you gonna write a book?” Unfortunately, not everyone can be Suzanne Collins and have a multimillion-dollar series turn into a multibillion-dollar movie with Woody Harrelson and Jennifer Lawrence. I’d have better luck at writing one mediocre novel, faking my death (because everyone is more famous after they die), lying low and living off those funds indefinitely. Obviously, I’m being slightly dramatic. Slightly. But trying to enter the working world is like trying to enter a bank when you’re dirt broke. You have to do it, it’s difficult and in theory, you can, but man, it really, really sucks. Of course, some will get lucky and get their ideal occupation on the spot, but the majority are gonna have to work their way up. The time that we’re living through is tough. There are so many opportunities, and the competition has never been more difficult. So stay focused, take what you can get and build that resume; nothing is forever, and only greater things are ahead. Forever be onto the next, because no one (except for the engineer and business majors) is gonna get their dream job as soon as they throw their cap. Prayers up to the graduates, love you guys.