As the much-anticipated Nov. 22 creeps closer and closer, students can’t contain their excitement for a week at home and the chance to enjoy home-cooked meals, their own beds, and no roommates (especially those in triples and quads — looking at you, first-years).

Of course, the best part (at least from a first-year’s perspective) appears to be that you are free from professors, classes and almost all things academic — if you so choose — for a full week. Nothing sounds better than not having to go to my 9:30 a.m. for a week, though I do feel for those with earlier alarms than my own.

But what I, and many other first-years, have yet to experience are the detailed interrogations we will have to undergo upon returning home. Fall break is a quick breath of fresh air, but not long enough for every relative you know to inquire about your very, very personal life (I don’t want to talk about why I don’t have a boyfriend, Aunt Bertha) and academic interests.

To better prepare my friends and myself, we asked some seasoned upperclassmen what to do about this impending nightmare. Responses were varied but nonetheless important.

“I swear, nothing was made for this like business cards were. Print out roughly four for every middle-aged relative, one for the younger ones just trying to be nice, and maybe 10 for the more forgetful or elderly ones,” Hank Givings ’20 said. “Mine say things like “‘No, I don’t have a girlfriend,’ ‘I am still a philosophy major and don’t know what I want to do with my life,’ and ‘it isn’t a drinking problem if I have no problem drinking.’”

Other students gave friendlier answers, which we weren’t looking for, but we needed all the help we could get.

“I actually really enjoy talking to my family and getting to tell people about everything I’ve learned so far as a religious studies major,” Rachel Holliday ’21 said. “I try to have a couple of minutes with everyone because I haven’t seen them in a while, and they all seem to want to know how everything is going with me.” Okay, boomer, but some of us don’t want to do that.

I guess we should just hope they are asking because they missed us, and not to stir the gravy. Good luck to everyone, and happy holidays!