Dear International Olympic Committee,

Hello, we here at The Bucknellian, the University’s student newspaper, are writing to you today in order to inform you about what we think you must know about the winter Olympics.

Our audience and ourselves are loving all the events so far in the Olympic Games Beijing 2022, just like we did with the Tokyo 2020 Games last summer. We commend the hard work you put into bringing the games back and keeping the athletes and everyone else involved safe, as well as other changes you have made to improve various aspects of the events. The cardboard beds you debuted last summer were ingenious.

And we are still concerned for the athletes’ safety, both from the ongoing pandemic and from the injuries sustained during events. The seven-player pile up during last Friday’s women’s ice hockey match as well as the tragic Biathlon incident from last Tuesday will certainly be unforgettable. But we aren’t here to discuss what should be done to further ensure the athletes’ safety. 

No, we’re here to discuss the public disappointment in all the games cut from this winter Olympics. The winter games are always fewer in number than the summer games, but it’s even fewer this year for reasons you refuse to explain. So we are informing you that we want the following games to be brought back to the winter Olympics, and that we are even in the process of reading petitions to gain signatures in support of bringing these games back.  

The first game we want to be brought back is Sledge Ball, otherwise known as dodgeball on sleds. It is a perfectly reasonable game to have in the Olympics seeing as any country can form a team. It requires rigorous training in both sledding and throwing things at other athletes, both already showing up in other Olympic sports, so we know athletes can do it. It’s also very popular with fans, so why not bring it back?

The second event is the Ice Sculpting event. While we agree it’s not technically a sport, making statues out of ice is extremely difficult to do and when the individual and team competitions are each 10 hours long, it certainly becomes a very physically and mentally demanding task. In our opinions, made professional because Lewisburg roads get icy in the winter, this makes Ice Sculpting an acceptable competition for the Olympics. 

The final game people want brought back is the Reindeer Games event, which is essentially the winter equivalent of the summer Equestrian event but with Reindeer. The amount of accidents when riding the Reindeer are the same as with the Horses, so fans can’t see a reason why it was taken out in the first place.

We all hope that you will consider our grievances and reinstate the games we all love so much. We shall wait for your response with baited breath while watching the rest of the winter Olympic Games. 

Sincerely, The Bucknellian and Many More Perturbed Fans