KLARC shuts down to recover from the post-New Year’s overflow

Thao Nguyen, Staff Writer

With the new year officially upon us, now is the time that many people attempt to fulfill their New Year’s resolutions. Some people task themselves with challenging resolutions, such as perfecting an Elvis Presley impersonation to test Austin Butler’s theory about the accent becoming permanent.

Others choose more attainable goals, including drinking more water out of their new Stanley cups that replaced their barely-rusted Hydro Flasks. However, despite the abundance of different resolutions one could work towards, the most common resolution for college students is always to work out more.

In an anonymous survey conducted by New Year, Same You-niversity last month, around 52 percent of Americans admitted that working out more is their resolution for 2023. Therefore, it is no surprise that students here at Bucknell are getting their gains at the KLARC more than ever.

This influx of students not only tempered with the ecosystem of frat bros and gym rats, who make up the  majority of the KLARC’s population, but it also led to the KLARC temporarily shutting down due to constant overcapacity. 

“I’m all for people trying to exercise and be healthy, but this has gotten out of control. Not only do we not have enough equipment for everyone, but some of our equipment has mysteriously disappeared,” a KLARC student employee said.

Weird sweat marks have also been found across the pieces of equipment as the high occupancy of the gym has led to the gym being more congested and hot; for instance, on the seat of one of the bench press machines, there was, strangely, a face mark.

In the past few weeks, gym staff has been coming up with many creative ways to manage the crowd levels. Prior to the KLARC shutting down, gym staff members asked students to share machines with one another due to the crowd level.

Consequently, many students elected to two at a time on the treadmills, which was a big learning curve. Due to the shortage of free weights, some students also have to share dumbbells together with one student carrying one end and the other student carrying the other, having to lift in sync. 

One gym regular and baseball player, Jack Fit, was especially saddened when the KLARC shut down. 

“I was really disappointed to see the gym close!” Fit said, “The gym was my home, bro. And thanks to these NARPs, I have nowhere to do my sets and to check out my rock hard abs in the mirror for my TikTok nation— @jackfit_Xtreme,” Fit said angrily as he instinctively flexed his raging biceps. He continued, “Good thing I took some of the free weights and other equipment from there to my dorm. I knew this day would come.”

The KLARC has not announced an official reopening date, but we will keep you updated as soon as we hear any news, especially for our fellow gym rats.

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