Bucknellian employs Lewisburg residents to run the paper when all editors go abroad
April 28, 2023
No offense Bucknell, but by the time students reach spring of their junior year, they want to get out of here. That’s why about 42% of Bucknell’s students study abroad during their four years in the ‘burg. Studying abroad is so popular, all 17 of “The Bucknellian’s” editors are going abroad next semester. Bucknell has numerous “Bucknell in” programs that the editors are participating in, including Bucknell en France, Bucknell in London, and Bucknell en España. Unfortunately, “Bucknell in” has left Bucknell in need of new newspaper editors now that all of theirs will be gone.
Us editors would never be so irresponsible as to leave without finding replacements! We know that Bucknell students have a lot of responsibilities and expired caf food on their plates. So while we venture the globe, we’ve decided to employ Lewisburg residents to keep the paper running.
Since satire is the most important section of the entire publication, this was the first editorial position we looked to fill. Thankfully, Adam Sandler moved to Lewisburg just last week. Now that Sandler’s kids are grown ups, he decided to just go with it when his wife suggested they sell their LA estate and move to Pennsylvania to lead a more modest lifestyle. Sandler told “The Bucknellian” that he plans to write his first satire piece about the 50 best places to have a first date, which he would follow with an article suggesting the scariest bedtime stories to tell children.
Next, we sought a local who could act as a temporary news editor. We wrote a letter imploring local news reporter and Lewisburg legend John Durgandy to accept the position. Durgandy, a Bucknell alum, was ecstatic when we extended the offer! He has since been shadowing our current news editors to see how they like to run things. First, we taught Durgandy that news pieces always end with a signature line. He has since disclosed that his weekly send off will be “You stay classy, Lewisburg.”
The next editor position we filled is none other than the Editor-in-Chief. For this role, we looked to choose a who knows the ins and outs of Bucknell life, a long time Lewisburg local who is truly one with the students. After much deliberation, I am honored to announce to you all “The Bucknellian’s” newest EIC, Buck Nelson!
Mr. Nelson will be at the helm of the paper for the foreseeable future, hopefully finally bridging the gap between campus and the larger Lewisburg community. For me, this will be my last article for a while since I’ll be studying abroad with Bucknell en France next semester. Until we meet again, I bid you all a cordial au revoir.
Austin • May 1, 2023 at 1:24 am
Excellent!