Sorority women scream into pillows in desperate attempt to recreate raspy recruitment voices

Amanda Relick and Senior Writer

The welcoming shrieks of sorority women could be heard all throughout the University’s campus Aug. 26- Sept. 2. The sorority women who live in Hunt Hall worked tirelessly to perfect the songs they sing to welcome their potential new members (PNMs), which needed to be sung at maximum volume to have the desired effect.

During recruitment, sorority women spent hours shouting the words of their sisterhood songs to startled PNMs. Smoker’s coughs and complaints of sore throats could be heard all throughout the quad and the Bison. Non-Greek students were horrified to hear the deep raspy voices of the sorority women and could only imagine what horrors recruitment was inflicting upon them.

Just as their siren-like voices were about to give out, sorority women were given a much-needed break between Pref Night on Aug. 30 and the excitement of Bid Day on Sept. 2.

As recruitment and the excitement of new women joining their sisterhoods has come to a jolting end, sorority women are having a tough time adjusting to normal life. While the third week of classes has the voices of sorority women inching back to normal, many of them have found themselves missing their raspy, croaking recruitment voices.

“I miss my raspy voice, I think it was kinda cute, you know? And it showed how loud and proud I was representing my sisterhood,” Gamma Delta Iota member Susan Smith2B ’18 said.

Smith2B is not the only sorority woman going through this crisis. Countless other women described their raspy recruitment voices as “sexy” and “fun.” These women mourn the end of recruitment and the sexy voices it bestowed upon them.

Alarmingly, hundreds of sorority women have been documented this past week trying desperately to recreate the coveted “recruitment voice.”

“I heard it in the middle of the night and thought there was a wild animal outside,” first-year John Malcolm-One, whose RA is a member of Gamma Delta Iota Sorority, said.  “We all came out into the hall and realized the noise was coming from our RA’s room. She was screaming into her pillow.”

The RA, who wishes to remain anonymous, is not the only sorority woman engaging in this shocking behavior. All over campus, sorority women have been screaming into their pillows at night in the attempt to regain their sexy raspy voices.

“Until I have the opportunity to scream for 8 hours straight again,” Smith2B said sadly, “I will never be able to get that special voice back.”

Hopefully in the weeks to come, recruitment and consequently raspy voices will fade from the minds of the University’s sorority women so that they will be able to fully recover and rejoin campus society.

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