University to issue dress code of J.Crew barn jackets and L.L.Bean boots starting Oct. 1

Amanda Relick, Staff Writer

The University’s mandatory dress code of J.Crew barn jackets and L.L.Bean Boots will take effect on Oct. 1.  The panic among the first-years has reached new heights as many of the self-proclaimed “hipsters” insist that they have never heard of these so-called trends before.

Upperclassmen gleefully run to reopen their collections of University fall essentials at the first turned leaf and release of the pumpkin spice latte.

Many students are proud of the University dress code.

“Over my years here at the University, I have bought every style of J.Crew barn jackets in every color so I can match them to my outfits,” Olivia SouthCampus4 ’17 said.

Many first-years are attempting to fight back against what they believe to be an unjust uniform.

“Why can’t I just wear my thrift store army jacket? That preppy look just isn’t for me,” Kim Vedder2NE ’20 said as she blasted away on her longboard.

While some die-hard hipsters like Vedder2NE have chosen to protest the University’s dress code, many edgy first-years seem to have caught fall fever.

On Sept. 26, the first chilly day of the semester, the first-years crashed both the J.Crew and L.L.Bean websites in their attempts to attain these essential fall items.

“I don’t know why, but all of a sudden I just felt like I needed Bean Boots, like I wasn’t going to be able to survive the fall without them,” Bea Malcolm3 ’20 said.

While the first-years have put up a valiant effort to defy the dress code, it seems that once again the mandate has taken its naive victims and created the new generation of preppy students.

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