Survey finds 60% increase in senators looking out windows sadly

Rose Gendelman, Staff Writer

A recent poll conducted by a Capitol Hill statistician surveyed how U.S. senators typically spend their free time. The categories to choose from included checking themselves out in the mirror, pacing around their office trying to appear busy, arguing, whitening their teeth for pictures, working on policies, and looking out the window sadly.

The results were quite striking, showing a 60 percent increase in senators looking out windows sadly from last year’s poll. You might be asking yourself: Are they taking a photo for their Facebook profile picture? Are they searching for a political epiphany? Or, most likely, are they dropping a mixtape soon and attempting to fool us all?

Unfortunately, the poll cannot answer all of our burning questions. We’ll just have to wait and see what the senators do this calendar year. (But if you want my opinion, I think it’s a Capitol Hill mixtape. Mark my words.)

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