Spring break hacks

Bridgette Simpson, Staff Writer

As days become longer and the weather continues to warm up, students across campus are itching for March 6. Most are looking forward to going home and catching a break from the University’s steadily increasing workload, but some luckier students will get to spend a week somewhere that isn’t home. 

Although the stereotypical spring break trip doesn’t appear to be very common among first-years, fake orders have been on the rise, suggesting only one thing: students are excitedly preparing for their exotic spring break trips. There just can’t be that many students at the University residing in Connecticut and New York. Or are there? 

Some tips on remaining low key over spring break, including ideas on what to do if your fake gets taken, have been compiled into a list below from students across all class years. 

  1. Definitely wear sunscreen. “I cannot stress this enough, you will look awful in your spring-break-cute-and-flirty-posts if you look like a lobster. Please just trust me. Do it for my freshman year self… she didn’t know any better either. But the post has been archived.” – Sunni Jones ’21.
  2. Invest in a one-of-a-kind flask! It’s recommended that you do this rather than trying to make your own ‘sunscreen bottle flask.’ The odds of you cleaning it out enough for it to not taste like there’s sunscreen coating your tongue, lips and throat are really, really low.
  3. Don’t go into bars with your friends all at the same time, especially if it looks like some them aren’t a day over 12. “One year, my friends and I all went into a bar at the same time with our Hawaii IDs because someone thought it’d be a funny tribute to McLovin, but one of my friends still had braces on so that blew our cover. The bouncer easily took down all five of us, too. They’re bigger than they look in the movies.” – Luke Bahama ’20. 
  4. Do not, for any reason, engage with wildlife after drinking. “I went to go pet what I thought was a dog because its fur was this unique green color. Turns out it was just a huge lizard, like this thing was almost bigger than me. And some lady had it on a leash, so my bad for being confused. Just don’t touch anything.” – Liz Daniels ’22. 
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