The List: Thoughts high schoolers have on admitted students day

Jon Meier, Satire Editor

 

  1. Wow, that’s a lot of BMWs.
  2. This tour guide is definitely hungover.
  3. Why are there so many blonde people that go here?
  4. Are Bean boots a fashion statement or a functional thing?
  5. [At the cafeteria] The guy in the Yankees jersey just threw up in his cereal. It must be pretty easy to get sick at a small school like this.
  6. This campus is pretty quiet on Saturdays. Where does everybody go on the weekends?
  7. The top of the science building looks like a boob. 
  8. I wonder if you could go sledding down the main hill in front of the academic quad.
  9. Academic West is an awful name, Breakiron is pretty cool though.
  10. I’d definitely go here over Lehigh.
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