Jon Meier Archives - The Bucknellian

Jon Meier, Satire Content Editor

Creative Writing and Political Science ’20

Jon was born during the intersection of a shooting star and the taping of a Mitch Hedberg special. He joined the Bucknellian as a joke and somehow found his way to the top as its head joke writer. His future plans include being reincarnated as Anderson Cooper’s sole black hair.

All content by Jon Meier

J. Cole album arrives just in time for hypebeasts

Jon Meier, Satire Editor
April 26, 2018

University’s most failed alumni: where are they now?

Jon Meier, Satire Editor
April 19, 2018

China includes ‘White Privilege’ among new tariffs imposed on U.S.

Jon Meier, Satire Editor
April 5, 2018

The List: Thoughts high schoolers have on admitted students day

Jon Meier, Satire Editor
April 5, 2018

Trump invites leaders of China and North Korea to play squads on Fortnite

Jon Meier, Satire Editor
March 29, 2018

Chief of Staff John F. Kelly turns to Tinder for new hires

Jon Meier, Satire Editor
March 8, 2018

Kushner’s security clearance downgraded from top secret to “high school senior”

Jon Meier, Satire Editor
March 1, 2018

Professors get creative with new integrated perspective courses for fall 2018

Jon Meier, Satire Editor
March 1, 2018

Jesus Christ arises too early, caught on wild night out

Jon Meier, Satire Editor
February 22, 2018

Five ways to get that spring break body in 2 weeks

Jon Meier, Satire Editor
February 22, 2018

Single student buys all of the University’s singing valentines

Jon Meier, Satire Editor
February 15, 2018

University club ruins local dog naming contest

Jon Meier, Satire editor
February 8, 2018

Knitted goods kingpin arrested in Vedder Hall

Jon Meier, Satire Editor
February 1, 2018

Fraternity brothers invent first level 5 autonomous vehicle

Jon Meier, Satire Editor
January 25, 2018

Religious studies department releases holiday album

Jon Meier, Satire Co-Editor
November 30, 2017

Senior discovers international roommate is fluent in English

Jon Meier, Satire Co-Editor
November 16, 2017

Jon’s Declassified: Holiday Edition

Jon Meier, Satire Co-Editor
November 16, 2017

Former high school valedictorian takes the SAT to regain confidence

Jon Meier, Satire Co-Editor
November 9, 2017

Jon’s Declassified, Volume III: Good questions, bad advice

Jon Meier, Satire Co-Editor
October 26, 2017

Bucknell announces varsity Spikeball team

Jon Meier, Satire Co-Editor
October 19, 2017

The List: Things to say to convince your friends that you like sports

Jon Meier, Satire Co-Editor
October 19, 2017

Jon’s Declassified: Good Questions, Bad Advice

Jon Meier, Satire Co-Editor
September 28, 2017

Parent banned from future Family Weekends for making too many dad jokes

Jon Meier, Satire Co-Editor
September 21, 2017

Sorority chants accidentally summon demon

Jon Meier, Satire Co-Editor
September 7, 2017

Earthquake attributed to nationwide cringe during Game of Thrones season finale

Jon Meier, Satire Co-Editor
August 31, 2017

Five books to reference to impress your college friends

Jon Meier, Satire Co-Editor
August 31, 2017

First-Year student with Bible-thumping parents listens to Lil Wayne’s entire discography

Jon Meier, Staff Writer
April 6, 2017

Fat Tuesday files for legal name change

Jon Meier, Staff Writer
March 2, 2017

Investigative report: Student secretly added excess amounts of Lanthil-Oxatin-Vernyl-Ethylene (L.O.V.E.) to food on campus

Jon Meier, Contributing Writer
February 23, 2017

Donald Trump incapacitated by Chipotle because he refused to admit he wanted mild instead of hot salsa

Jon Meier, Contributing Writer
February 10, 2017

Electronic devices equipped with artificial intelligence achieve sentience to speak out against Muslim ban

Jon Meier, Contributing Writer
February 2, 2017

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