Donald Trump incapacitated by Chipotle because he refused to admit he wanted mild instead of hot salsa

Jon Meier, Contributing Writer

Although Democrats were unsuccessful in their attempt to blockade Betsy DeVos’ confirmation as secretary of education, there were reports of a different type of blockage in Washington today.

Around midday on Feb. 7, President Donald Trump and Vice President Mike Pence made an appearance at the Chipotle Mexican Grill located on 14th Street. What some suspected as a publicity stunt may have had dire consequences as Trump has since cancelled three subsequent public appearances.

The White House has yet to release a statement regarding his absence, but according to Chipotle employee Rosa Gardner, the answer may be more straightforward than expected.

“He got hot instead of mild. It looked like he wanted to change his mind, so I asked if he was sure but he doubled down instead. He started going off about how no one loved hot sauce as much as him and that he only ate the hottest sauces in the world. He then told the entire restaurant that he loved Mexicans,” Gardner said.

There were also multiple confirmations of Pence asking for extra mayo on his burrito bowl.

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